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2011 Poetry Form Challenge#23 Luc BatThe Luc Bat is a Vietnamese form of poetry, which simply means six eight. You can see there was an influence by the French as it was The Colony of Indo China before it became Vietnam. It was introduced into Europe by the French, but for some reason never became popular. I cannot understand why as it is challenging without being too difficult. The odd lines (1,3,5,etc) are six sound units and the even lines (2,4,6 etc) are eight sound units long, hence the title. The rhyming scheme is simple also. The last word (sixth sound unit) of the odd lines rhymes with the sixth sound unit of the even line and the eighth sound unit rhymes with the sixth unit of the next odd line. The final even line, linking back to the first line. I'm sure you can see the French influence here. A twelve line poem would have a pattern like that shown below.
Luc Bat Alternatives
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Luc Bat Replies
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Maryse AchongThe challenge's almost done And it seems I have run right out Of time and left with doubt It really makes me pout, this form It is far from the norm. I feel the rules swarm all around To confuse and astound Me, 'til I'm almost drowned in words This must be for the birds. I hear stampeding herds of verse Bearing instructions terse I guess it could be worse, I've won. back to list |
Kathy AndersonWhen love finds a young girl She thinks this pal is fine, That any hue is sign But souls aren't wine and bread So some may lose their head To fair felt reddened blush, For feelings, no thoughts rush, Instead they hush and twine first Sure this one is true thirst. Though the quaff went down fast, To young to know minds cast Shall each not last the quirl?  back to list |
Divena CollinsBlack stockings cant go wrong Not even with a sexy thong in black For she will never ever lack She certainly has the knack to lure Her motives are demure Tho` she may seem so pure of mind She is one of a kind No doubt he will find out very soon When a lady plays his tune He shall howl to the moon with Joy She has found her toy boy A tease in black can do no wrong.  ----- Chatterbox There`s no joy in sorrow For no one shall borrow the pain There is nothing to gain To repeat a refrain once more For that could be a bore They shall only ignore it by choice Persistance of that voice Why dont they rejoice now instead It just had to be said So gently they tread lest she hears Why must there be these fears Shall be here to chatter tomorrow.  ----- Crazy Love The closest thing to crazy When misted eyes are hazy with love The funny things we speak of Of silly little words thereof to please That createth much to tease Makes lovers feel at ease together Crazy tho` its true whatever They may do, they forever create fun Both hearts are crazy as one And so love doth run without shame For they both feel the same Desires to ignite a flame so crazy.  ----- CuddlyTots, Nursery Rhyme`s Once upon a nursery rhyme When mothers had the time to read Childs dreams were in need Wonders of fantasy feed the mind Pictures of another kind With images that unwind to dream Faerie tales it may seem May stimulate a theme of fiction A calming of tension Thus the attention of an eager child How cheerfully they smiled Their fantasy beguiled one more time Once upon a nursery rhyme.  ----- Dungeon of Hell Black the clouds that enfold Shaded images that hold much fear Drawing menacingly near Silent, nothing to hear only a tap Drip, dripping of serum sap Dregs from violent mishaps of fate She had ventured too late Through a dungeons gate of hell No one survived to tell But for echos from a well of doom. Of bats in silent gloom As spider webs loom to enfold.  ----- Dying Embers In the stillness of night A fading tallow light so tame Now a flickering flame Lovers play the same of desire That which was once a fire Ends up a spent pire of embers But future remembers They were loving members of fate Who had started too late But as time could not wait to try Chances passed them by But spirits will never die this night.  Dying Swan. art work by Vladimir Tretchikof ----- A Ladies Prayer I praye my Lorde of vanity And thank thee for clarity of mind That thy shalt be so kind. For ever as I find you the same I spareth thee of shame And taketh no blame for frivolity Nor of feckless jollity, Nor decline in quality of speach Nor wicked tongue teach I hear what thy preach within book For I hath ne-er forsook Nor shalt I overlook my sanity.  Painting Of Lady Hamilton, Lord Nelsons Mistress. ----- Of Eternal Love Come to me love divine Pray tell me thou art mine this night We shall seek eternal light Thro mist of time lies bright the future Once more we shalt nurture Inducing heavenly culture to love When the angels sigh above Shall we both then cry out in ecstacy Or is it only in fantasy. We know we have been here before Danced thro` paradise doors To embrace eternally of love divine.  ----- Patience With Calm --- Luc Bat Sonnet Time has been part of us Whether early on time or too late Just a question of fate No precious time to wait at all Has to be there on call Impatience may fall from stature A part of human nature Wonders of natures cures invented That future prevented But aroma`s of a scented calm Within a soothing balm Should do nobody any harm but good No inclination to brood Creating a calming mood for us.  ----- Peace With Serenity --- Luc Bat Sonnet By the calm of the ocean How gentle the motion of waves Foaming of tides thro` caves Playful water nymphs brave the tide Upon crests of surf they ride `Neath a full moon to guide them thro` Gently the breezes blew Over a wide ocean of blueish green Mermaids were to be seen Basking the rocks serene of mind It was there they did find Perfect peace a kind of emotion For love and devotion Within calm of the deep blue ocean.  Art Work by J. W. Waterhouse ----- Prayer Of Love If It please thee my Lord On thy hilt of thy sword pray oath May God be with us both I honour thee to betroth this love Verily I shalt pray thereof Unto the heavens above for a sign For my true love divine. Shalt he mayhaps be mine this day For this I alone shalt pray Shalt it be aye or nay together If only we wouldst ever Both Cherish one and other forever.  ----- Raven Upon the wings of passion Soaring `neath a cushion of clouds Black of feathers enshroud So noble of head held proud and high He glides across the sky Keen within eyes that pry for prey He must nourish this day The most natural way to survive He that was born to thrive Just to stay alert, and avid to seek Fresh flesh betwixt his beak He that suffers not compassion.  ----- Tir na nOg Elvin dance thro` forests green Woodwind pipes now serene upon glades `Neath the fullest moons shades Celtic fantasy songs that fades with dew Notes of rays that start anew What joy melodies grew within hearts Arise fair spirit music starts Dance `fore a cloud parts of darkness How pure doth music caress Of gentle tones that stress shall give Celtic songs chant to relive Upon forest woodland alive and green.  back to list |
Etain DruantiaButterflies dance, knees quake, restless, disturbed, awake, I wait, for Life has shown my Fate and so to future mate I fly, not once to question why. Mom sighed when I said bye to her, but knows our love is pure; yes, my heart is quite sure of him- this is no foolish whim. Green eyes meet blue, both brim with love, one lifetime not enough True love stands out above the rest- we passed this trying test... Now two as one our nest we make. -----
Driftwood -----
Tongue In Cheek |
Jem FarmerAs voices call aloud Bring it forth through the crowd, young men, Amid the tales of then, Through valley and wild glen we call, Bring light and love to all, Lift winter’s icy shawl from earth, To celebrate a birth, With our laughter and mirth, inspire, All that we should desire, To light the Pagan fire of Yule, One log that is the fuel, The Sun King shall soon rule the year, An end of darkness, near, And dawn’s first ray, a spear through cloud.  ----- Chimes the Found It's beginning the way, The dawn of a new day of dreams, That echo flowing streams, And mystery now seems to sound, The bell that chimes the found, As feet step on the ground then wend, The soul becomes a friend As will begins to bend with need, Those wantings dare to feed, Planted a simple seed of thought, And thus, the heart is caught, While senses flame and taut reveal There is more to love's deal, When we hear what we feel can say. ----- It Was A Dark And Stormy Night A flash lit up the sky, As thunder grumbled by the rain, My heart lay gripped with pain, My mind going insane this way, Hot and cold air at play, While dreamings drift and sway around, The wayward thoughts abound, Where love dared not be found instead, The dreams came in my head And in this storm to bed I’ll go, For wonderings I know Allow not love to grow within, For fear that would be sin, Yet thunder, my chagrin, still roars As lightning kissed rain pours Cleansing the muddied floors of why!  ----- Music Without Tone I can’t let go of you One love forever true we share, I cannot begin to dare To say the words of care when asked, Our love was made to last, Yet time seems wide and vast alone, Like music without tone, My heart beats on its own while tears Are hidden by veneers. And lies that passing years will ease. I still sit beneath trees, Where once we heard the breeze and cried, For love we were denied, And there we gently sighed the pledge, Before the veil placed its wedge. Now I stand at the edge of dreams, Alone neath lunar beams, My heart can only scream in pain, As tears disguised as rain Fall down my cheeks again for you. ----- Thoughts at Sea To gaze upon the sea, All emotions float free away, In the tidal affray, White horses roll and play each night, As dreams, again take flight, Making love, taking fright and lo! Refreshing tidal flow, Reveals what is to know and more, Embracing the sea shore, Destiny comes before the eye, Looking towards the sky Where new horizons lie and wait, Here I accept my fate, Destiny shall create a new, As waves rolled and winds blew, In this place where once you loved me.  ----- Yuletide Love Gentle flakes, flurried flight, Float in the last light of the sun, Just before skies are dun For Yuletide has begun with bells Ringing out across the fells, Once again, the story tells of birth Amid the festive mirth So life all o'er the Earth returns Upon the ground fire burns The goddess never spurns her child, A Pagan heart beating wild, In darkness, she has smiled tonight.  back to list |
Ivor HoggUnder a shady tree Is the best place to be Listening for the tune. Granted as a boon to men Who long for peace again The hear now and then, the breeze. Singing among the trees A song certain to please Music which will relieve their fears Clear every worry from their mind All that is left behind. Peace they may only find:Rarely. back to list |
Ryter Roethicle- 1 - When the world is new born Sun's scattered seeds are sown and fall On ground no good at all Yet see some fruit grow tall and lush Berries ripe on every bush. And other life forms push through earth As day starts giving birth Playing, wondering the worth of man Why the Gods created Pan How he fits in the plan or scheme What's the heavenly dream? Wondering is their theme a jest As the sun finds earths crest You harken to him best at dawn. - 2 - Now, hear his spirits rise Each time he greets the prize of morn Out of darkness is torn Pan's gift of newly born, bright day. Music helping blow away Cobwebs of a yesterday of sin Weakness of human kin Each fresh morning begin anew End of night bids adieu Smiling waiting the new daybreaks Never the same mistakes But everyone still makes the same The nature of the game Dawn's a picture frame disguise. - 3 - His finale at last, All on Earths has passed to musk The sun's a red dwarf husk Last time, he plays at dusk his dirge No more will feelings surge No more has man the urge to fly Weary now, time to die. Nor is there need to cry, it's time. No sun from the East climb Life's clock a final chime then murk Angels have done their work All that time they didn't shirk and now He stands, they fly in a row Honouring as they go silent past - 4 - Again another bang Just like the other sprang in site New Universe fresh light God shows us his might, again Cosmos spurting semen We see new suns begin to glow New world begin to grow New life begins to show and form Sunlight reaches out to warm See it begin to swarm and play See him at break of day The creatures listening sway at morn Greeting the fresh new dawn Beast or plant that's born or sprang. - 5 - Once I heard the piper play It was the break of day so still Beasts sitting on the hill Listening to him until the end Each united each a friend Every silhouette did blend just then Just now Earth is Heaven. Angels listening with men at peace Just for a while release Pan has caused a cease to war See them sit on the floor How can anyone ignore this fact Look there, a peaceful act Why can't they make this pact today?  ----- Beyond Eternity (Italian Sonnet) How much do I love thee How much do I love thee Just look and you will see how much. Man has no measure as such But becomes more each touch or look. It says so in the book And once caught can't unhook, ever We will never sever, you'll see. We will have our moments Of upsets and torments, but know In the end love will grow. Realise there is a flow, a bond That if we should respond It will take us beyond moments.  ----- Family Dinner (Italian Sonnet) There is no snow just heat Winter admits defeat for now So birds and pig and sow Purchased with a sweaty brow today On the 25th make its way To families who will stay awhile And to each other smile Dining in a happy style and eat Far more than what's normal In a manner less formal this time Family together is fine Talking'n eating's no crime today Everyone wants their say It's the older form of gay and normal.  ----- Happy Waltz (Italian Sonnet) Dancing in the rain- Feeling the cold, the pain, cast down From the sky- then the clown Being cleansed as I drown my sense Ridding emotions less dense And the walls of defence, I'm free To be who I wanna be Knowing that you love me again. Splashing puddles in joy Believing I'm not a toy to you Its time for another view One with our debut together Now time is just a blur Spinning as we concur our joy.  ----- Penang Beach (Italian Sonnet) Beside the gentle sea I sit Feeling an easing of my wit Normality returns a bit, I roar How long will it be before Chaos returns once more I wonder? I'll not be dragged under Casting stressors asunder, I see I am in control of me. The high tide laps as if answering I may not know all things I know when stress rings, ignore I have been there before I wont have any more today I'm ignoring you, go away!  ----- Question of Patience (Sonnet) What is the use of time? Speed causes angers climb upwards. Patience earns no rewards Slowly moving towards your goal, Knowing love makes you whole, Prepared to pay the toll and more. It's all that you asked for A prize is at the core - sublime! If you were in control Would you feel more whole to do What you always wanted to, Or somehow always felt 'twas wrong Following feelings too strong, Or time took much too long, to feel whole?  ----- Soulmates (Quaterns) Oh innocent victim Finally you're at the brim of life Know there will be no strife And love will be so rife, not grim. It's such a pleasant state When a man's found his mate for keeps Pleasure goes ahead in leaps Then one day, see he weeps, it's Fate. She has gone, she is dead A fate all lovers dread, ever. As soulmates bound together In time they'll meet forever 'tis said.  ----- Thy Music (Italian Sonnet) My music is thy hearts beat. Thy words are songs so sweet I swoon No way am I immune. My song in time I croon with you A duet matched by few. But think nothing is new with love 'Cept the cast list'd above There's no change we're kind of complete. Realise we're like children Who ignore all wise men because They know only loves flaws And say that we should pause awhile; But all lovers just smile Because they are beguiled again.  ----- Time Spent (Quatrains) Eyes looking inviting A simple kiss delighting, wants more That kiss opened a door Loves portal forevermore your 'Thing'. That simple kiss started Thoughts much more delighted, and so From that we saw love grow And now, certain we know, fears shed. Time spent but not wasted Touches with feather tipped finger All dreams willingly linger A simple harbinger tasted. Eyes close but not in denial As pleasures start to pile higher You think you hear a choir And it has also lit a fire, Eternal. ----- Wine (Italian Sonnet) Has less effect than you Your kiss a headier brew, I know So abundant in it's flow So warming the afterglow I feel It's affect like wine I reel Too much, so much appeal so nice And yet so cheap a price For this exotic spice, from you. You fill my glass freely Offerings made sweetly it's said From lips like wine so red Drive senses from our head, until We have lost all our will Once again my glass I fill ideally.  back to list |
Leny RooversIn a dark, starless sky Creatures of the night cry loudly The sound is troubling me Why don't they let me be this night? Instead of causing fright In this dark without light I hear Shrieks of terror I fear Knowing life is so dear to those For whom death might be close Life is a prickly rose at best Its beauty mixed with jest Until all comes to rest at last And fear will then be past I know the die is cast tonight I hear the screams of fright The beasts of terror light the sky. ----- Close to me I want to hold you close Enfold you like a rose its stem Protect you like a clam Will shield its inner gem from hurt Thus keep it free from dirt By power or by word of force And without much remorse I shall uphold my source of love So peaceful as a dove Take care that nothing rough will meet My sweet love's path or lead Away from me the heat I chose ----- Dreams I dream of you at night There burns a fire bright in me Which makes me feel so free This warming glow will be shared soon Under a Southern moon A starry sky a boon of fate I meet at last my mate We hope at any rate this much Shall know for sure on touch Then we will both know such sweet bliss Forget that we did miss To touch and hold and kiss for long It made our love real strong Nothing can now go wrong this night. ----- On the Plane Into the night I fly I hear a baby crying loud a mother gives a shout a father takes it out of bed some older children fret they just want to be fed some more though they have been before flying is but a bore to them all they can do is dram the parents cannot hem them in they look sheepish and grin when their kids won't finish fast so it's quiet at last I slept, some hours passed, I wake three more it then will take it's quite a trip I make, no lie! ----- Your Love You are my peace of mind With you I tend to find my rest My happiness is best When you love me with zest so great We feel it is our fate To love again this late in life This time just love, no strife Into its sea we dive with glee It's great to feel so free It's all I want to be today Carefree and warm, we may Enjoy this golden ray in kind. ----- You and Me I can feel you in me Strong threads are between me and you After all we went through Love proved to be true at last We did learn from the past The hours will go fast until The day we meet, such thrill My heart beats so fast, will we match I can feel my hands stretch Out to you, when you fetch me from The airport and welcome Me, hold me, kiss warmly, see. back to list |
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